Newsflash: Emma expresses an opinion

Strange though it may seem to people who know me well, I actually tend to hold back from expressing strong opinions when I'm in 'work' mode. I trained in the Alpha school of evangelism which emphasises listening, accepting, asking questions and not imposing your own views.

However, this evening I was at a volunteer training session and was chatting to one of the other volunteers about my work doing street outreach to women involved in prostitution. The other woman said: "Oh that's interesting, I've been involved in researching government policy on the sex industry; some people argue that it's a valid choice for women and a paternalistic government shouldn't assume that choice should be taken away. What do you think?" Now, if someone asks you what you think at Alpha, you're allowed to say, although I would tend to go gently when expressing opinions which are likely to be controversial. Granted, I was not on an Alpha course, but I was still a missionary talking to someone who I am pretty sure was not a Christian, being asked a question about an area of ministry I feel passionately about. Normally I would start a long conversation, find out more about the other person's point of view, express my own thoughts with much hesitation and clarification... However, the person running the training had just started to say "If you're all finished, could you please look this way...," so there was no time for beating about the bush, and so I said: "I think it's sick and wrong."

Many, if not most, issues are open to various interpretations, and I usually find I can sympathise with people's views even if I don't agree with them. But when it comes to issues like this I really think our society has gone mad. I love the women I meet who are involved in prostitution, and I know God loves the men who pay as well, but the practice of prostitution itself is surely just plain evil.

Reflections after first night of street outreach

It is nearly 3am and instead of trying to sleep, I am blogging... head very full, need to download (or upload, depending on how you look at it!).

Spent four hours doing street outreach in East London for the first time. Chatted to women involved in prostitution and some drunk homeless guys. One of them got a bit affectionate; luckily we were able to back away and laugh it off. Gave out lots of tea, hot chocolate and condoms, and loads of chocolate bars. Called an ambulance (another first). Spent some time in A&E. Saw a punter, a perfectly normal, nice-looking bloke. Weird. Felt scared walking down dark streets, crossing the road to avoid groups of lads. Ate a bagel with pickled herring at 2am. Feet hurt now. Up at 9.30am...

Too busy not to pray

I have been feeling ill at ease recently, and I think I have located the source of my problem. It is so easy in Christian work to get very busy very quickly, doing lots of things "for God" but not actually involving him in the process. To make things worse, I am one of those people who struggles to still her mind for any length of time. In recent weeks I have taken to playing solitaire on my laptop while watching telly - I am so fidgety I can't even give a TV programme my full attention! I can sustain praying silently and alone for all of about 90 seconds before my attention strays elsewhere. One approach which has worked for me in the past involves producing a collage to represent a passage or verse from the Bible, the idea being that it gives my hands something to do while, in theory at least, my mind is listening to God. Another possibility is that I drag myself out of bed half an hour earlier and walk five minutes down the road to the university chapel where Jenny the chaplain prays every morning with anyone who comes. If anyone is reading this, please pray that God would help me wake up...

"I am the vine, and you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will bear much fruit; for you can do nothing without me." (John 15:5)

Candle wax, money and driving in London

I now have a PAID JOB, which is very exciting. I am assistant to the chaplain at Queen Mary, University of London (see my blog post on the best sign ever), 10 hours a week. The concept of being paid for Christian work is a new and very exciting one for me. On Wednesday I spent a fair portion of the morning trying to get candle wax out of a red carpet using an iron and some kitchen paper...it does work.

This week I have also experienced driving in central London for the first time - a nerve-racking experience. I never know if the other drivers are madmen or if I'm in the wrong lane... I drove a mile down the road last night (it was dark and I was ill) and it took me 25 minutes. Would've been quicker to walk.